Surgery Day- May 16th

Well May 16th was the big day for fs and it was here!! Matt had got back to the hotel around two am and we both maybe got 2 hrs of sleep. We had to be at children's hospital at 6 am to check in and get things started like all the paperwork, last minute questions with the doctors, all that history they need for labor and delivery and of course IVs and the epidural too. I didn't realize that I would have to have an epidural also with this surgery. I guess it only made sense once I thought about it ;) this was my room while getting ready for surgery. The bathroom was beautiful!!

Everything went by pretty fast that morning and before I knew it I was saying goodbyes to Matt and my parents and me and my little man were being wheeled off into the OR. I remember going in the OR and having so much anxiety. The room was huge and there were already so many people in there getting things ready to go. (I work as a surgical tech so the OR is nothing new to me, but not knowing how things would work and what I would wake up to was a sick feeling)  I was told that during the surgery there would be up to possibly 30 people in the room with all the teams that needed to be there incase they would have to deliver Hudson at that time. I was hoping to wake up still pregnant!! 

After 2 hrs of surgery (seems quite fast) I woke up in the pacu in a horrible amount of pain.  I 

remember the doctors asking if I could feel my legs and I lifted them high up in the air. Obviously my epidural didn't work so I had to have another one fresh out of surgery. They let Matt come in when i was awake and It was great to have him by my side. I just remember hearing the                              

doctors say that things went well and I was still pregnant. At that point that's all that mattered!!

Denver Bound

After making it back from Denver and chatting with people who means the most to us we started planning on how we could make this work. Knowing if we went through with this that we would be in Denver for possibly up to 4 months if Hudson decided to come early......
Matt works with a construction company called Ames. He had mentioned to his boss that it was possible that we may be doing Fetal Surgery in Denver

and wondering what the chances would be if he could be transferred for the time we were there to be with me but still be bringing in money. After all I wouldn't be working til after  Hudson arrived and bills still needed to be met. Within a day or so they let Matt know that it would not be a problem to be transferred and they would even pay for our place to stay where he would be working. The only downfall was him working graveyards. But hey he would be able to work and be with me so we could not have felt more lucky. Things just continued to fall into place and we had made up our minds this was what was supposed to be happening. Nevaeh would stay with my family and Matt's and they would make it work. I was sick to be leaving our little girl but we knew that we needed to focus on our little guy too and give him the best chances at life.
I called and scheduled one last consult and surgery for the 16th of May. Matt had to leave that Sunday (Mothers Day) and my parents were going to drive me out Monday and stay with us for the week while I had the surgery. It was a time when I needed my parents by my side also. Things were becoming real and I was so nervous to have this big surgery. I overanalyze pretty much everything. And decision making is not a strong point of mine so for the whole week up until we signed papers and I guess the morning of surgery I would ask Matt and my parents are you sure this is the right decision.... In my mind I knew it was because things just fell into place for it not to be. I knew that if we chose not to we would always wonder if we should have and what would be different.
We had our last consult/paper signing Wednesday. Tues and Wed I had the steroid shots to help develop his lungs if he would choose to come early. That night my parents and I went to dinner (Matt was working) and had some good laughs and headed back to the hotel that was now home for a couple of weeks, I took my pill that I was scheduled to take to help with relaxing my uterus and waited for Matt to come home early. The big day was only a couple hrs away and the anticipation once again sat in.

Big Decisions Ahead

Between the time of finding out that our baby boy had SB and our next Perinatology visit we were busy doing research on the in utero fetal surgery that was being done in 5 states. In the beginning we both felt that it wasn't for us. The more we talked to our families and doctors we figured well maybe we will go consult and see if we even pass the guidelines to do so. So off we went to Denver to do a full day of testing and consulting. Talk about overwhelming. We started the day at 7am after getting into Denver late that night. The first thing we did was an MRI of our little guy. Yuck is all I can say.  They told me when I went in that it could range from 1-2 hrs depending on how active Hudson was.  An hr and forty five mins later I was done!! Thank goodness for technology and being able to watch "The Wedding Planner" or this mama would have went crazy!!!
Next appt was the ultrasound with a high risk perinatologist. Things hadn't changed from the last ultrasound we had in Utah a week prior. Everything looked great other then his ventricles and the opening on his back. He was definitely showing off at this point. The Dr. Kept saying how he couldn't believe how active our little man was. That always put a smile on our faces and gave us a sense of peace. After being in ultra sound for an hour and a half we were booking it to our next appt which was Hudson's echo. Luckily they were a little behind so we had a minute to grab a bite to eat and get some fresh air.  His echo turned out great and we were told his heart was "beautiful"!! Finally some good news to all the bad we had received the last few weeks.
By this time it was about 245 and we had til 330 til our "Team Meeting" with all of the doctors who we had met with and the doctors who would be in on our surgeries. The anticipation was setting in after a long day of testing we couldn't wait to get the answers we were looking for and catch our flight home. When we walked into the meeting all the doctors stood up that were sitting around a big table and welcomed us. I began to sob. I had held it together all day but at this point I was completely overcome with emotions and happiness that we had some amazing doctors who were there to help us and our little man!! After a long meeting with the doctors discussing the lesion level, the pros and cons to fetal surgery and everything else the surgery entailed we were told we were candidates for fetal surgery and now was the time where we had to make the biggest decision of life's yet. We had a week to do so where the surgery had to be done before I was 26 weeks. Fetal surgery or not?